The Secret Life Of Roach
by DandelionsFlyingThroughBlueAir
Summary: Everyone has a dream. These two insects have wild ones. Bug's: to be a Starship Ranger. And his best friend Roach's: to be an artist. Here's a crazy story about a little bug trying to make it in a cruel world. A bit AU.
1. Chapter 1

THE SECRET LIFE OF ROACH

CHAPTER ONE

by DandelionsFlyingThroughBlueAir

•••••••

**A/N: I always felt like Roach deserved a little more love in Starkid fanfiction...**

•••••••

Title: The Secret Life Of Roach

Genre: Friendship

Characters: Roach & Bug

Plot: Everyone has a dream. These two insects have wild ones. Bug's: to be a Starship Ranger. And his best friend Roach's: to be an artist. Here's a crazy story about a little bug trying to make it in a cruel world. A bit AU.

Rating: K

•••••••

"Welcome to the world, little roach."

A tall egg planter bug stood in front of the newly hatched bugs. He smiled at them as three of them slipped and slid around the mammal they had just been hatched out of. However, the little roach stubbornly refused to come out. The egg planter wondered why. Another older bug who looked rather bored looked on. The egg planter kept trying to coax the little roach out of the unconscious mammal.

From the inside of the mammal, Roach refused to come out. He didn't want to go out the normal way. He wanted to do something different. It would be cool to make something that could get him out...Ooh! Roach thought. He gathered all his might, and then he let out a massive gust of air that exploded the mammal.

Roach slowly found his way out. The three other little bugs gazed at him. The bored bug rolled his eyes. And the egg planter looked just about ready to burst, like Roach's mammal just did. He seethed. The bored bug (let's name him Bee for future reference, as he is one) awkwardly patted him on the head.

"He's only a couple seconds old, please don't bug out on me about this."

He snorted, thinking about the new batch of bugs that would come in to become new mammal wranglers today at the request of the Overqueen. How many of them would actually like their jobs? The vast majority wouldn't. But they'd be forced into it anyway. And the cycle would keep going, on and on and on until one day either the Overqueen changed the system (unlikely) or all the bugs died.

What an optimistic bug Bee is, isn't he?

The egg planter started to calm down, taking jagged breaths. He pointed towards the blown up mammal and sputtered.

"Tha-tha-tha-mam-mam-them-eat..."

"Yes, master," Bee said sarcastically. He rolled his eyes again. Boring job, boring life, boring mammal wranglers...

Bee suddenly changed his usual blank facial expressions to bright and perky.

"Hiya bugs! Why don't ya go ahead and eat your pretty mammal over there!" he exclaimed.

The four bugs obliged, and went for the mammal. They gobbled it up like it was nothing. (In reality, it greatly resembled a green version of Pikachu, a great and awesome thing indeed.) Once the bugs had finished chewing up Pikachu, they glanced at Bee with no particular reason or intent.

"What?" Bee muttered, looking away and feeling awkward.

"Why are you such a pessimist? Why are you sarcastic? How did you get this job? Why do you do your job? Do you like your job?" Roach exclaimed all in one breath.

Bee glared at him. "Not applicable, because, the Overqueen, because, WHAT DO YOU THINK?"

Roach thought for a minute. "You hate it?" he thought out loud.

"I think he does," Roach's 5-second older sister Beetle said.

"Why?" Roach persisted.

Bee sighed. This little creature-critter just wouldn't give up, wouldn't he?

"Because I didn't choose this life," he sighed. "I wanted to be a pollen collector."

Roach, Beetle, and the two other bugs all simultaneously cocked their heads. "What's a pollen collector?" Roach asked curiously.

"A special type of bee that collects food, primarily pollen, for making honey. They wear these cool yellow and black jackets," Bee sighed. "I've done that a lot in my long two weeks for my family. They're brave! And they get to go out of the Hive. But when I found out I can't do that anymore because of the Overqueen..." Bored shrugged. "My life is now over. I found out just a few days ago, and I still hate egg planting."

"Wow," Beetle gasped. "I sure hope the Overqueen lets me do what I want to do!"

"Isn't the Overqueen usually kind and merciful?" Roach said cautiously. He didn't know how he knew this; something inside of him told him that this was true.

"Yes," the egg planter declared, now fully recovered from the shock of Roach exploding the mammal. "Yes, yes she is, and may I ask you, Bee, to not brainwash these little hatchlings into your rebellious theories about our wise and powerful Queen!"

The egg planter quickly brushed himself up. "Come on, hatchlings. I'm going to take you to your mommy. You have a few more siblings that should hatch in any second."

At these words, they all heard cracking sounds. The mammal wrangler immediately ordered Bee to go take care of the new hatchlings, and he grudgingly obliged, now back to normal.

"Wow," the egg planter said. "Usually hatchlings don't get a lot of words out of Bee. He doesn't talk much. I do wish that he lightened up about his job. Egg planting can be fun if he just tried!"

The four little roaches trotted after the egg planter, who led them to their family cave. As they made their way to their lives, Roach whispered to Beetle, "I know what I wanna be when I'm a big bug!"

"What?" Beetle whispered back.

"A...creator...thingy!" Roach exclaimed. "I can invent new ways to get little hatchlings out of mammals faster! That's what I was thinking of when I wouldn't come out. I can create so many things - that's a job, right?"

"That's cool!" Beetle responded. "I'm not sure what I wanna be when I grow up."

"It's all right, Beetle. You've got a lot of time to figure out what you wanna be! And if you don't figure it out, you can always rely on the Overqueen to help you!" Roach exclaimed. Another random thought that just came to him.

They stopped at an average sized cave, hearing the noisy sounds of playful bugs inside. Roach smiled. He knew just the thing to quell the noise!

••••••

The next few hours were bliss for Roach. He met his mom, his dad, and his ten million older brothers. Though he had a shy beginning, he quickly opened up to his new family. With every wacky situation the brothers got into, Roach came up with some interesting ways to solve it. Take the argument between Buggy, Cater, Pillar, Dragon, Fly, Ziggy, Zaggy, In, and Sect, for instance. They were all quarreling about who slept where in their little section of the sleeping cave. Buggy, Dragon, and Sect all wanted the corner, but obviously they all couldn't sleep there at once...until Roach solved the problem by making an insane bug system with "bunk rocks" out of the little rocks they were to sleep on, complete with specially made leaf blankets and soft, fluffy dandelion pillows for all of them. Fly had a silvery, swirly pattern, Sect had scissors and paper designed on it, Buggy had various other types of bugs on his, and so forth. Of course, they all started up an argument about who was going to sleep on which level. At this point, Beetle jumped in and told their parents about the argument, which instantly shut them all up.

But after those few hours, his ten million older brothers started telling lots of really cool stories about the Overqueen. Dragon told a story about his friend Peachy, a fresh off the chrysalis butterfly, who was able to fly around in her new job, a berry gatherer. "She gives you the ability to do your best!" Dragon exclaimed. Ziggy told stories about all the awesome army ants he's befriended. "The Overqueen makes them who they are today: totally awesome!" Ziggy declared. And the stories kept on coming. "The Overqueen is almighty and powerful!" "Gives you whatever you want, gratis!" "What's gratis?" "Shut up, Jiminy." "She's, in a word? Awesome." "Even if you don't like her, you have to like her. It's because she's royalty, you know?" "Shut up, Jiminy." "She's so amazing, she's the whole reason this world and your fellow bugs are successful!" It seemed like they all worshipped the Overqueen, even Jiminy, who seemed to be the sarcastic one who was just having fun psyching the hatchlings out. Even Roach, after a while, started to idolize her. Bee who? The Overqueen couldn't be that bad after all! Who was Bee to know anyway?

As a matter of fact, Roach never saw Bee again after that day.

••••••

**A/N: And so the story begins...I'll get the next chapter up as soon as possible! If you're wondering, when Roach says "creator" he really means "artist" because art is not something that is really used in Bug World. **


	2. Chapter 2

THE SECRET LIFE OF ROACH

CHAPTER TWO

by DandelionsFlyingThroughBlueAir

**A/N: Time has passed since the last chapter. **

•••••••

Title: The Secret Life Of Roach

Genre: Friendship

Characters: Roach & Bug

Plot: Everyone has a dream. These two insects have wild ones. Bug's: to be a Starship Ranger. And his best friend Roach's: to be an artist. Here's a crazy story about a little bug trying to make it in a cruel world. A bit AU.

Rating: K

•••••••

"Roach! Get up get up get up!"

It was Beetle, one of Roach's three sisters out of 10 million siblings and counting, most of them brothers. She grinned and ran away as quickly as possible. Figures, Roach thought, she's probably off with Flutter and Buggette now. He wondered what Mom and Dad had cooked for breakfast today. Roach rubbed his eyes and rolled over again.

Suddenly, he remembered what day it was, and he immediately jumped up. It was the day he was going to find out what job he was going to have for the rest of his life! Secretly, he really wanted to be some sort of creator or innovator, like the Overqueen. After all, she was the one who organized the very logical system of "the needs of the many bugs outweigh the needs of the few bugs." He always built the craziest things to solve all his brothers' problems. From the wild catercoaster he had organized with Bug and the brothers the other day, to grudgingly helping rebuild and rewire the crashed Starship that Bug had taken interest in...the mural he painted of his entire family on their cave wall to the flower chains he made for Beetle and the girls as an apology for the destruction of their sleeping area...inventing and creating and building and making the world a brighter place was just...his thing. But he knew that the Overqueen would never allow it. People like that weren't needed in Bug World. And if they weren't needed, most likely Roach would never officially be one. He didn't even know what the real word for it was.

So Roach's usual answer to the ever-asked question of what he wanted to be when he grew up: the Overqueen's assistant. "Hey, why not?" he'd reply if the person asking gave him a quizzical look. It wasn't his first choice, but in all honesty, he could settle for that. All of his brothers idolized the Overqueen, and this Overqueen admiration society included Roach. He was known throughout his family and group of friends for being somewhat of a good bug, too afraid to break the rules. So this answer was usually expected out of his countless uncles and aunts. And some of them were literal ants! Sometimes his friends would call out on him for being such a good bug. People usually did that, and it never really bothered him that they did.

But Roach knew that he could count on Bug to respect who he was, just as he respected Bug. Those two were best friends, two peas in a pod, inseparable. Ever since that first day at Bug School, when they were both sent to the principal's office within minutes (Bug accidentally set off a mini rocket in science class, Roach got busted for reading a book during a boring Bug History class), they had bonded. Roach loved Bug's sense of adventure and how he pushed him to be better; most of all how he stayed true to himself, even when others mocked him. Bug, in return, loved that Roach was so loyal and kind; most importantly that he would stay Bug's friend through anything, and didn't mind that most people thought he was weird for being so obsessed with the Starship Rangers. Bug showed Roach the sky and how their dreams could true; Roach kept him grounded and gave him reality checks from time to time. They could tell each other anything; unlike the other boy bugs, they weren't afraid to express their strong shared feelings of loyalty toward each other. Roach showed Bug his fascination with inventing early on in their friendship; as a result, Bug was always his sidekick when Roach got an inspiration to create and invent new things that made their days so much fun. And even when they weren't busy carrying out inventions and projects, they would hang out either at Roach's or Bug's caves, or, nowadays, the crashed Starship that Bug was currently obsessing over.

Roach, though, was not too huge on being there all the time. He was not very comfortable being on something that came from...a different planet. Who knows if someone died on it, or if there was someone inside it that was frozen all this time...it seemed very eerie and strange. In short, Roach did not like that Starship. One bit. Even though he helped rebuild it.

Roach stretched and got out of his rock bed that he shared with a bunch of his other brothers. He knew that Mom and Dad were making something special for Beetle, Aphid, Palomena, and himself today, in honor of their job selection day. Beetle was hoping to be a mammal wrangler; Aphid wanted to be an egg planter in honor of Bee (she was secretly hoping to see if he was still alive), and Palomena was still not entirely sure what she wanted yet. Roach scurried down the rock and made his way to the eating log, where everyone was gathered to eat breakfast.

"There's the sleepy bug!" Fly, one of Roach's brothers announced as Roach scampered to his usual spot.

"Sorry I'm late," Roach panted.

"He was probably thinking, I woke him up a few minutes ago," Beetle put in.

Roach swatted Beetle, who rolled her eyes and inched away from him. Their mom and dad rolled out something that smelled delicious! Roach craned his head to see what they had cooked up: delicious rotten eggs!

"We know that all four of you love this, and we figured we'd hit two bugs with one stone," their mom smiled.

"Good luck to Roach, Beetle, Aphid, and Palomena!" their dad announced.

All of their siblings cheered and whooped like they hadn't done this a thousand (or more) times already. A few shouts of "Yeah, Roach," and "Go, Beetle, go!" mixed into the chaos. _Yup, we're a rowdy bunch_, Roach thought, smiling. _And that's exactly how I like it._

They all dug into the rotten eggs, the four celebrants trying to hoard as many rotten eggs as possible. Roach tried to finish as quickly as possible. He still wanted to hang out with Bug before they headed off to the Overqueen for the job selection. Because, hey, one of them might get nourishment. Quite a few of Roach's brothers had been selected for nourishment; when Dragon hadn't come home for dinner, it wasn't pretty. So there was that little fact that they might never see each other again after today.

Roach slurped up the last of the rotten eggs, and yelped, "Mom, Dad, can I go to Bug's? I'll be there until the job selection, the girls can walk on their own."

"Hey, why are you ditching us?" Aphid whined.

"For someone Roach's age, you really are a baby," Zaggy said.

"Yeah, we would have thought you'd want to walk without Roach," Ziggy pointed out.

Aphid growled as their mom answered, "Yes, you may go to Bug's cave, but don't wander too far, don't go where the Mosquito Brothers usually hang out, and don't go to the crashed Starship. That thing could be dangerous!"

"Alright Mom!" Roach sped off, knowing that for sure all three rules would be broken by the time job selection rolled around.

•••••••

"Hi, Floris," Roach said as Bug's mom let him into their cave.

"Hi, Roach," Floris said wearily.

"Is Bug here?" Roach asked her.

"We thought he was," she said. "We think that he snuck out last night. He's probably-"

"At the Starship?"

Floris nodded. "I'm worried about him, Roach. That Starship is taking over his life. Your inventions are cool, but just not worth the trouble."

Roach felt a slight pang in his heart as she said that. That was exactly why he didn't share his passion with most other bugs. He had never directly told Floris and Mantis about his creating thing, but he was sure that it must have popped up once in conversation with Bug.

"I've told Mantis about my worries," Floris continued. "He thinks that bans and punishments and grounding aren't going to work. But I don't want Bug to become too attached to the humans - they could be dangerous. That Starship could be dangerous."

"Plus it's kind of illegal."

"Yes, that too."

The Overqueen had specifically ordered 20 years ago, when the Starship had crashed, that no one was allowed to go near the Starship, let alone hang out there or repair it. If the Overqueen found out about Bug and Roach's little excursions, they would probably get nourishment immediately.

Floris sighed. "Go to the Starship and see if he's there. If he is-" Roach started to briskly walk out of the cave, he could hear some of Bug's siblings start to yell friendly hellos, "-tell him to stay away from that blasted Starship if he knows what's good for him!"

••••••••

Roach hid behind a thorn in a bush. He had to get out of the bush, through the fence, and beyond the boundaries of the Hive in order to get to the crashed and resurrected Starship. In normal circumstances, this would have been a bit much, but the Overqueen had people watching everyone's every move. And although this wasn't on Roach's bucket list of things to do before he died, this was important. Today was the day that both friends were going to find out what they were going to do for the rest of their lives..._Bug can't have his head stuck in the clouds today!_ Roach thought. He squished his way through the bushes, pausing only to say hi to a few ladybugs who greeted him. He made his way out of the bush and scurried his way up the fence, making sure that no one saw him in the process. Thankfully no one did, and he jumped through the crack in the fence.

Now came the challenge: getting out of the Hive without anyone seeing him, and without getting serious injuries climbing up and over the mountain. Little known fact about the Hive: it's completely surrounded by mountains. Great, big, jagged, rocky mountains. With giant killer scorpions lurking around every corner of the caves. And a certain Starship crashed right at the top of one.

Roach shielded his eyes from the blinding sun as he stopped to rest on a ledge.

"What I wouldn't give to be a flying bug," he panted.

Roach stretched and continued his long trek up, still panting. As he kept climbing up, he felt the sense that someone was watching him. Suddenly one big, huge killer scorpion stared down at him, smiled at him, and slowly extended one long, sharp claw right near him...

"AAAAAAAGGGHHHH!" Roach screamed at the sight of the scorpion and quickly sped up. He was not going to back down now. Not after all he had been through.

Roach jumped onto a ledge. He searched wildly for something, ANYTHING, that he could use as a weapon. Roach's eyes drifted to a bed of rocks. Well, not his first choice, but I'll take anything at this point, Roach thought quickly, terrified. Roach grabbed a few rocks and hurled them at the killer scorpion's eyes. The scorpion howled and Roach took the opportunity to run for it.

He scampered up the mountain. One more step, he chanted in his mind. One more step and you're there, and you're away from this hideous creature.

_Yes!_ he thought as he reached the top. Roach quickly searched the top and found the Starship. He keenly tried to overhear what Bug was doing in there.

"I wanna be a Starship Ranger...I wanna have the things they've got..." Bug murmured. "But they're just one little thing they are that I'm not."

"Hiya Bug," Roach muttered, and he quickly opened the door to find Bug inside.

••••••••

**A/N: Guess who the scorpion was. :) Anyways, that's it for now! I'll post again tomorrow, where we catch up with the musical!**


End file.
